[REC] (2007)
- not "Quarantine" +1000
- Spanish is ostensibly cooler than English +100
- but "ostensibly" is a pretty cool word +5
- "While You're Asleep" is a brilliant title +100
- impressively long cuts +50
- excellent lack of soundtrack +100
- first bite at 14 minutes +140
- it's a deep bite +40
- angela wields her "Freedom of the Press" like a roaring chainsaw +50
- holy shit! Alex from above! +40
- likely ode-to-Braindead facial injection +60
- Angela's contagion-figuring ability +40
- bite fest through the window! +50
- holy shit! zombie jennifer! +40
- holy shit! missing corpses! +40
- el mazo +100
- "They were eating her alive, Manu. What the hell is this?" +100
- raises that fundamental question, which should you be more afraid of: zombies or your government? +500
- vital info = fatal wound +40
- and then there were three +33
- el mazo! +200
- this is the movie that started me keeping a zombie stick by the door +500
- it's metal, and it's heavy +100
- the terror is palpable +200
- the attic? are you serious?? +300
- camera as functional tool for palpably scary attic check +200
- surprising meld of demonology and zombology +500
- +4628
THEREFORE:
- deny the "quarantine"s and the "ring"s of the film universe. deny "the eye", "the orphanage", deny "body snatchers", "the crazies", "the birds", "day of the dead", "dawn of the dead", "carrie". deny "breathless" and "vanilla sky" and "holmes" and "charlie and the chocolate factory", "death race", "flubber" and "friday the 13th". "a nightmare on elm street". "godzilla". "night of the living dead 3D". planet of the apes the postman always rings twice psycho shaft shutter the grudge sweeney todd war of the worlds the wolfman. deny remakes, Y2K upgrades, and northamericanizations that simplify and anglicize perfectly good movies. technicolour is amazing. three dimensions is really fantastic. people who talk like you and look like you and wear your clothes and drive your cars is really super. but if only you'll sacrifice the effort it takes to read and watch at the same time, there is a real glut of movies out there that are really much better than any ol' remake.
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